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The current structure of this article is, shall we say, rather odd. The text singles out two incidents and is in such an unseemly rush to direct the reader's attention to them that it places them above the actual biographical info, creating an impression of Ms Kame'eleihiwa and her concerns that is probably unfair. --
IslandGyrl05:41, 21 August 2005 (UTC)reply
You're absolutely right IslandGyrl. I should have put them in the opposite order, instead I put them in the order I found them...I'll make the change immediately. --
JereKrischel
Hi, JereKrischel, mahalo for the prompt response. See what you think of my latest revisions. Here's my version of the remaining to-do list for the article:
Can we not also find an instance in the press where Ms Kame'eleihiwa in her capacity as an activist also said something pithy that even her critics concede was positive and constructive? There's still an impression that "for all her fancy credentials, all she does is carp about ancestry or lack thereof".
I think we need to have a numbered citation [2] following the Samoan-actor / Kamehameha quote (also appearing under External links, as I've done for the Brotman/Grammy business). I also feel that the quote is a little long (that's one reason I un-italicised it), but your mileage may vary.
Do you have sources for the "writing a book about Hawaiian sexuality" info? Can post/discuss here, doesn't have to immediately go into the article.
(Tonality nitpick) To my ear, "another dozen" (courses) does not sound sufficiently "encyclopedic".
Style tip or nitpick: I wouldn't capitalize section heads as if they were book titles. I'd just capitalize the first word and proper nouns, as if it's an ordinary phrase. That's why I changed "Recent Activism" to "Recent activism".
Aloha IslandGyrl, the revisions look great. I will look for something positive and constructive from Lilikala, but it may be that only her most controversial statements have been widely published.
Insofar as the Hawaiian sexuality information, I got that information from materials for "Building Bridges with Traditional Knowledge Summit Meeting". Lilikala presented "Ka Le'ale'a o na Kupuna: Ni'aupi'o, Punalua, Po'olua & Aikane (Hawaiian Sexuality in Traditional Times, A Celebration of Life)". It was orginally at
http://www.botany.hawaii.edu/traditionalknowledge/events/sessions/presenta/abstracts/Kame'ele.htm, but has since been moved, and only exists in google cache now I believe. The
google cache page is where I found her biographic information, and I did not edit it for content or style when I posted it to the wikipedia. If someone actually knows Lilikala perhaps they could solicit her for more recent information.
Again, your editing and nitpicks are much appreciated! Thank you very much! --
JereKrischel
Cut-n-paste fixed
OK, I have put the history of this article back together here.
Lily Dorton has been deleted; if y'all discover that it is a name she used at some point (even if she now disavows it), and it needs to come back, let me know, and I can 'un-disappear' the history of that one.
Noel(talk)01:33, 13 September 2005 (UTC)reply
The following discussion is an archived discussion of a
requested move. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section on the talk page. Editors desiring to contest the closing decision should consider a
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Support -
WP:WORLDVIEW, and yes I know that it's only a guideline, but those who support it support it. Pretty obvious from her own publications what her own preference is, and if we're taking the view that "no not even the Hawaiian historian and director and professor at the University of Hawaiʻi's Center for Hawaiian Studies can have a Hawaiian name because.. [she's been mentioned in sources without Hawaiian fonts] etc." then we're basically saying that no
WP:BLP can ever have a Polynesian-language name on en.wp.
In ictu oculi (
talk)
13:34, 26 November 2012 (UTC)reply
Using an apostrophe in place of an ʻokina is just wrong; either remove it entirely or use the correct glyph. I don't care which one, but the current title is blatantly unacceptable.
PowersT16:28, 30 November 2012 (UTC)reply
The above discussion is preserved as an archive of a
requested move. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section on this talk page or in a
move review. No further edits should be made to this section.