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The Rambling Man (
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10:08, 6 March 2021 (UTC)
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Comments
- J.S. Stearns --> J. S. Stearns
- As "lumber baron" redirects to "business magnate", it's worth linking lumber in the lead to tell us specifically what he was into.
- "He was involved" was also. Or ditch "other".
- "Stearns, as a ..." sentence has lumber three times!
- "lumber baron" is linked twice in the lead.
- Pine King in the lead and "Pine King" in the body.
- "He was involved in..." you already said what he was involved in in the first para of the lead.
- You link Michigan in the lead but none of the other states.
- "of a boating" in a boating accident.
- "at around" at not needed for me.
- "who had this tragic death at such an early age" unnecessary commentary.
- No need to link common words like "teen"
- "Miss Paulina Lyon" is "Miss" needed?
- Convert the miles for the people reading this who live in a metric world.
- Setback is just a single word.
- Several locations are overlinked: "Ludington, Michigan", ", Stearns, Kentucky", "Bagdad, Florida", "Odanah, Wisconsin", "Mason County, Michigan" etc.
- " it had 30 men " employed.
- "Pere Marquette Railroad." seems to be called Railway.
- "one of the top businessmen" in what sense?
- " Yamacraw and Oz." what are these?
- "bankruptcy.[6][3]" order.
- "banking interests in implementing new banking" repetitive.
- "Stearns built in 1902 the first all electric..." -> "In 1902, Stearns built the first all-electric...":
- Refs, no spaced hyphens, per MOS:DASH.
- Check date formats are consistent in refs.
- Page ranges also need dash not hyphen.
Not Done - don't know how to do. Can you help? Thanks. --
Doug Coldwell (
talk)
20:47, 6 March 2021 (UTC)
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- Ref 10 should be "pages" not "page".
- ISBNs should be consistently formatted.
- His death and death date etc appear to be missing from the article prose.
That's it for now, on hold.
The Rambling Man (
Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!)
11:13, 6 March 2021 (UTC)
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-
-
- FWIW -
It so happens that Professor Nagle authored this book in 2015 based on the Wikipedia article I created in 2010 on Justus Smith Stearns. He told me he is working on another history book about
Eber Brock Ward that he is basing off the Wikipedia article I have 91% authorship, that I did a
10 times expansion on 29 October 2010. --
Doug Coldwell (
talk)
21:40, 6 March 2021 (UTC)
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Happy with the article now so promoting to GA, good work.
The Rambling Man (
Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!)
12:00, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
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