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This
edit request by an editor with a conflict of interest has now been answered.
Hi, I work for Rent the Runway and I’d like to request that someone review the following proposals. I’m trying to clean up problems with the article to address the box on top that says the article needs clean-up for “neutral point of view”
Extended content
Rewrite leads so it’s less promotion:
Delete:
Jennifer Hyman is the CEO and cofounder of
Rent The Runway, a fashion and technology/logistics company that offers clothing, accessory, and home rentals from over 600 designer brands for women and kids via on-demand rentals and subscription.[1] Rent the Runway has pioneered dynamic ownership in the fashion industry and amassed a huge customer following of 11million people.[2]
Instead, add:
Jennifer Hyman is the CEO and co-founder of Rent The Runway, a fashion and technology/logistics company that was one the first[3] to offer clothing, accessories, and home decor rentals via on-demand rentals and subscription. [4]
Delete this sentence in Early Life because it’s not very encyclopedic: “Hyman was recently inducted into the high school's wall of fame.”
Delete this at the end of the first paragraph of Career as it sounds promotional. “….which was recognized on The Oprah Winfrey Show for its innovation.”
Delete these sentences in the second paragraph of Career since they’re not directly about Jennifer Hyman: “Rent the Runway’s employees are 93% female and/or non-white, with 80% of leaders who are women, including a female CEO, COO, CRO and CFO.[9] Rent the Runway, has been honored as one of the best places to work in New York State by the New York State Society for Human Resource Management.[10]”
Delete these sentences in the fourth paragraph of Career, which aren’t really important, biographically:
“Hyman participates in national conferences and panel discussions regarding such topics as the sharing economy, women in business, entrepreneurship, leadership, and company culture. Some of her past speaking engagements include NRF Foundation’s “Retail’s Big Show,”[14] WWD’s Digital Forum[15] and the 99U Conference.”
In the sixth paragraph of “Career”, delete this sentence as follows to ge rid of the subjective language:
Her passion for gender equality in entrepreneurship and tech also drove her to establish the Rent the Runway Foundation and Project Entrepreneur early in her career. Project Entrepreneur was founded in partnership with UBS to help female entrepreneurs across the country gain access to the tools, training, and network they need to scale their businesses.[5]
Instead, add:
Hyman established the Rent the Runway Foundation in 2015.[6] In 2018, in partnership with UBS, she co-founded Project Entrepreneur, to help female entrepreneurs with tools, training, and professional networks to scale their businesses.[7]
Delete, in Career, the following sentences, which aren’t about Jennifer Hyman: “The winning founders receive a $10,000 award, and a spot in the five-week accelerator program at Rent the Runway’s New York office.[18] After completing the accelerator, companies have seen success in closing rounds of funding, media coverage and continuing on to other top tier accelerator programs.”
Delete, in final paragraph, this language, which is promotional/subjective: “the pioneering initiative to keep New York the greatest city in the world for women.”
Remove the “close connection” template on the page because this has now been declared and because the main neutral point of view problems are addressed with these deletions.
The article has been copyedited to remove promotional information and claims concerning the subject's company, as the article is ostensibly about the subject and not the subject's company. The awards section also needs to be revised, as a majority of the awards listed there are not Wikilinked to their appropriate articles. These still need to be located; any that do not have their own articles in Wikipedia ought to be removed. Then I believe that the issue of the maintenance template may be addressed. Regards, Spintendo17:24, 15 November 2019 (UTC)reply
After being unable to locate WikiLinks for a majority of the awards listed in that section, I've removed those that were non-notable. This, along with the other edits, removes to a large degree the subject's POV from the article's prose. This I believe allows for the COI template to be omitted. Regards, Spintendo18:41, 15 November 2019 (UTC)reply
Request Edit
Part of an edit requested by an editor with a
conflict of interest has been implemented.
Hi, I work for Rent the Runway and I’d like to request that someone review the following proposals. I’m trying to expand the article so that it is more up-to-date and informative.
Extended content
Rewrite lead so it’s more accurate
“Delete:”
Jennifer Hyman is the CEO and co-founder of Rent The Runway, a fashion and technology/logistics company.
“Instead, add:”
Jennifer Hyman (born August 24, 1980) is an American entrepreneur. She is the CEO and co-founder of
Rent The Runway, a fashion, technology, and logistics company that offers clothing, accessories, and home decor via on-demand and subscription rental. [1]
According to
The New York Times, the company is valued at more than $1 billion.
[2]
In 2019, she was named to
TIME magazine’s
TIME 100 annual list of the 100 most influential people in the world.
[3]
Rewrite this section in Early Life so it is more accurate
“Delete:”
Jennifer Hyman grew up in
New Rochelle, New York, and attended
New Rochelle High School. She received her BA in social sciences in 2002, where Hyman was editor-in-chief of the Harvard Crimson.
“Instead, add:”
Hyman grew up in
New Rochelle, New York and attended
New Rochelle High School. She received her BA in social studies from
Harvard University in 2002. At Harvard, Hyman was the editor-in-chief of The Harvard Crimson’s weekly magazine Fifteen Minutes and was among the founding members of the Seneca Club, one of the school’s first women’s clubs.
[4]
Change this section in Early Life because it doesn’t have a citation
Delete this as the opening sentence of Career because it fails to address the beginning of Jennifer Hyman’s career or the origins of and current state of her work at Rent the Runway
Hyman co-founded Rent the Runway in 2009.
“Instead, add:”
After graduating from Harvard in 2002, Hyman worked for
Starwood Hotels, where she started the company’s wedding registry program. She then went on to hold management positions at then-start-up WeddingChannel.com and global talent management company
IMG.
[6][7]
In November 2008, Hyman first had the idea for
Rent the Runway after watching her sister agonize over buying an expensive outfit for a wedding.
[8]
Hyman and
Fleiss then cold-emailed
Diane von Furstenberg for advice and hosted a pop-up shop on Harvard’s undergraduate campus to see if women would actually rent dresses.
[9]
After receiving $1.7M in seed capital from
Bain Capital, Hyman and Fleiss officially launched
Rent the Runway in November 2009.
[10]
In 2016, Hyman and
Fleiss launched Rent the Runway Unlimited, a subscription service designed to help women dress for work and everyday life.
[11]
Hyman has since expanded Rent the Runway Unlimited to include home decor and children’s clothing rentals.
[12][13]
Move up the current third paragraph in Career to put in chronological order and fix current grammatical errors
In May 2018, Hyman published a
New York Times op-ed titled “Treating Workers Fairly at Rent the Runway,” in which she announced that the company would equalize benefits across its salaried and hourly employees. Team members in
Rent the Runway’s warehouse, in its retail stores, and on its customer service team receive the same parental leave, family sick leave, bereavement leave, and sabbatical packages as the company’s corporate employees.
[14]
Delete, in Career, the following sentence as it does not relate directly to Jennifer Hyman’s career: “Hyman has spoken out publicly against sexual harassment in the tech industry and went public with her own experience on CNBC’s Squawk Alley in July 2017. [5]”
“Instead, add:”
In 2019, Hyman raised $125M in venture capital funding, bringing the total equity that
Rent the Runway has raised to $337M and adding to the $200M credit facility it secured in August 2018.
[15][16]
In Career, add to the following section as it does not reflect all of Jennifer Hyman’s corporate board work: “Hyman serves on the Board of the Estée Lauder Companies and on the Women.nyc Advisory Board.”
“Add:”
She is a founding member of the
NYSE Board Advisory Council, which addresses the need for diverse leadership on corporate boards.
[17]
Add a section on ““Philanthropy”” to cover the full scope of Jennifer Hyman’s work
“Add:”
In 2015, in partnership with
UBS, Hyman co-founded Project Entrepreneur, a five-week accelerator program, to provide female entrepreneurs with tools, training, and professional networks to scale their businesses.
[18]
In Honors, delete “Hyman was listed in Fortune magazine’s 40 Under 40 in 2012” because it does not accurately reflect the honors she has received.
Below you will see where proposals from your request have been quoted with reviewer decisions and feedback inserted underneath, either accepting, declining or otherwise commenting upon your proposal(s). Please read the enclosed notes within the proposal review section below for information on each request. Spintendo22:17, 6 December 2019 (UTC)reply
Proposal review 06-DEC-2019
She is the CEO and co-founder of
Rent The Runway, a fashion, technology, and logistics company that offers clothing, accessories, and home decor via on-demand and subscription rental. According to
The New York Times, the company is valued at more than $1 billion. Declined.[note 1]
Hyman grew up in New Rochelle, New York and attended New Rochelle High School. Already done.[note 2]
She received her BA in social studies from Harvard University in 2002. Already done.[note 3]
At Harvard, Hyman was the editor-in-chief of The Harvard Crimson’s weekly magazine. She later attended Harvard Business School, where she met Rent the Runway co-founder Jennifer Fleiss and graduated with an MBA in 2009. Already done.[note 4]
After graduating from Harvard in 2002, Hyman worked for Starwood Hotels, where she started the company’s wedding registry program. She then went on to hold management positions at then-start-up WeddingChannel.com and global talent management company IMG Clarification needed.[note 5]
In November 2008, Hyman first had the idea for Rent the Runway after watching her sister agonize over buying an expensive outfit for a wedding. Approved.Cite error: There are <ref> tags on this page without content in them (see the
help page).
Hyman and Fleiss then cold-emailed Diane von Furstenberg for advice and hosted a pop-up shop on Harvard’s undergraduate campus to see if women would actually rent dresses. Clarification needed.[note 6]
In May 2018, Hyman published a New York Times op-ed titled “Treating Workers Fairly at Rent the Runway,” in which she announced that the company would equalize benefits across its salaried and hourly employees. Team members in Rent the Runway’s warehouse, in its retail stores, and on its customer service team receive the same parental leave, family sick leave, bereavement leave, and sabbatical packages as the company’s corporate employees Declined.[note 7]
Delete: Hyman has spoken out publicly against sexual harassment in the tech industry and went public with her own experience on CNBC’s Squawk Alley in July 2017. Clarification needed.[note 8]
In 2019, Hyman raised $125M in venture capital funding, bringing the total equity that Rent the Runway has raised to $337M and adding to the $200M credit facility it secured in August 2018. Declined.[note 9]
She is a founding member of the NYSE Board Advisory Council, which addresses the need for diverse leadership on corporate boards. Clarification needed.[note 10]
In 2015, in partnership with UBS, Hyman co-founded Project Entrepreneur, a five-week accelerator program, to provide female entrepreneurs with tools, training, and professional networks to scale their businesses. Declined.[note 11]
Delete 'Hyman was listed in Fortune magazine’s 40 Under 40 in 2012' because it does not accurately reflect the honors she has received. Clarification needed.[note 12]
___________
^This information concerns the company and not the subject of the article.
^The asked-for changes in this section of the edit request are already in the article.
^The references provided with this portion of the request originate from the subject herself. Please provide sources from reliable, independent
WP:SECONDARY sources that are not based on interviews with the subject.
^Ibid. Additionally, it is not known what is meant by the term pop-up shop.
^This information concerns the company and the subject's running of the company, rather than the subject herself. Please note that this decline applies only to the requested prose, and does not apply to text which may already exist in the article.
^Please clarify what it is, about this announcement, which qualifies it as not relating to the subject of the article.
^Unless this money was raised to supplement the subject's own income, this information does not relate to the subject herself, but rather, her company.
^Please provide the Wikilink for the NYSE Board Advisory Council.
^The subject's philanthropic activities are indeed noble causes, but they are not germane to the subject of the article. SeeWP:NOBLECAUSE.
^Please clarify how and in what way the existing prose does not accurately reflect the honors received.
Request Edit
This
edit request by an editor with a
conflict of interest was declined. Please see the reply section below for additional information about this request.
Hi, I work for Rent the Runway and I’d like to request that someone review the following proposals. I’m trying to edit the article so that it is more up-to-date and informative.
Extended content
Rewrite lead so it’s more accurate and includes more specific information about Jennifer Hyman and her business, Rent the Runway.
“Delete:”
Jennifer Hyman is the CEO and co-founder of Rent The Runway, a fashion and technology/logistics company.
“Instead, add:”
Jennifer Hyman (born August 24, 1980) is an American entrepreneur. She is the CEO and co-founder of
Rent The Runway, a fashion, technology, and logistics company that offers clothing, accessories, and home decor via on-demand and subscription rental. [1]
According to
The New York Times, the company is valued at more than $1 billion.
[2]
In 2019, she was named to
TIME magazine’s
TIME 100 annual list of the 100 most influential people in the world.
[3]
Rewrite this section in Early Life so it is more accurate - Hyman received her BA in “social studies,” not “social sciences” and she was not the Editor in Chief of the Harvard Crimson, but of an adjacent magazine.
“Delete:”
Jennifer Hyman grew up in
New Rochelle, New York, and attended
New Rochelle High School. She received her BA in social sciences in 2002, where Hyman was editor-in-chief of the Harvard Crimson.
“Instead, add:”
Hyman grew up in
New Rochelle, New York and attended
New Rochelle High School. She received her BA in social studies from
Harvard University in 2002. At Harvard, Hyman was the editor-in-chief of The Harvard Crimson’s weekly magazine Fifteen Minutes and was among the founding members of the Seneca Club, one of the school’s first women’s clubs.
[4]
Add this section to become the opening sentence of Career. The current start to the Career section fails to address the beginning of Jennifer Hyman’s career or the origins of and current state of her work at Rent the Runway.
“Add:”
After graduating from Harvard in 2002, Hyman worked for
Starwood Hotels, where she started the company’s wedding registry program. She then went on to hold management positions at then-start-up WeddingChannel.com and global talent management company
IMG.
[5][6]
Delete the following because it fails to explain the process of Jennifer Hyman’s founding story and her most critical contributions to Rent the Runway, including Rent the Runway Unlimited.
“In November 2008, Hyman first had the idea for
Rent the Runway after watching her sister agonize over buying an expensive outfit for a wedding. Hyman co-founded Rent the Runway in 2009.”
“Instead, add:”
In November 2008, Hyman first had the idea for
Rent the Runway after watching her sister agonize over buying an expensive outfit for a wedding.
[7]
Hyman and
Fleiss then cold-emailed
Diane von Furstenberg for advice and hosted a pop-up shop on Harvard’s undergraduate campus to see if women would actually rent dresses.
[8]
After receiving $1.7M in seed capital from
Bain Capital, Hyman and Fleiss officially launched
Rent the Runway in November 2009.
[9]
In 2016, Hyman and
Fleiss launched Rent the Runway Unlimited, a subscription service designed to help women dress for work and everyday life.
[10]
Hyman has since expanded Rent the Runway Unlimited to include home decor and children’s clothing rentals.
[11][12]
Move up the current third paragraph in Career to put in chronological order and fix current grammatical errors
In May 2018, Hyman published a
New York Times op-ed titled “Treating Workers Fairly at Rent the Runway,” in which she announced that the company would equalize benefits across its salaried and hourly employees. Team members in
Rent the Runway’s warehouse, in its retail stores, and on its customer service team receive the same parental leave, family sick leave, bereavement leave, and sabbatical packages as the company’s corporate employees.
[13]
Delete, in Career, the following sentence as it does not relate directly to Jennifer Hyman’s career: “Hyman has spoken out publicly against sexual harassment in the tech industry and went public with her own experience on CNBC’s Squawk Alley in July 2017. [5]”
“Instead, add:”
In 2019, Hyman raised $125M in venture capital funding, bringing the total equity that
Rent the Runway has raised to $337M and adding to the $200M credit facility it secured in August 2018.
[14][15]
In Career, add to the following section as it does not reflect all of Jennifer Hyman’s corporate board work: “Hyman serves on the Board of the Estée Lauder Companies and on the Women.nyc Advisory Board.”
“Add:”
She is a founding member of the
NYSE Board Advisory Council, which addresses the need for diverse leadership on corporate boards.
[16]
Add a section on ““Philanthropy”” to cover the full scope of Jennifer Hyman’s work
“Add:”
In 2015, in partnership with
UBS, Hyman co-founded Project Entrepreneur, a five-week accelerator program, to provide female entrepreneurs with tools, training, and professional networks to scale their businesses.
[17]
In Honors, delete “Hyman was listed in Fortune magazine’s 40 Under 40 in 2012” because it does not accurately reflect the honors she has received.
None of the reviewer's questions have been answered with this additional request, which just restates the original proposal.
Please note that discussion is often a key component to implementing edits, and requests may be adversely affected when they fail to garner additional input from the proposing editor. A main part of that discussion involves supplying reasons for why changes are requested to be made.[1]
^"Template:Request edit". Wikipedia. 15 September 2018. Instructions for Submitters: If the rationale for a change is not obvious (particularly for proposed deletions), explain.
Request Edit with Revisions
Request Edit
This
edit request by an editor with a conflict of interest has now been answered.
Hi Spintendo, thank you so much for your feedback on the previous proposal - I apologize for resubmitting and completely understand the decline of the same edits twice. I completely agree about the revision of this page being a discussion, and so appreciate your willingness to collaborate. Accordingly, here is a revised proposal that addresses all of your recommendations:
Rewrite lead so it accurately reflects the nature of the business that Jennifer Hyman has built.
“Delete:”
Jennifer Hyman is the CEO and co-founder of Rent The Runway, a fashion and technology/logistics company.
“Instead, add:”
Jennifer Hyman (born August 24, 1980) is an American entrepreneur. She is the CEO and co-founder of
Rent The Runway, a fashion, technology, and logistics company that offers clothing, accessories, and home decor via on-demand and subscription rental.
[1]
In the previous round of revisions, notes 3 and 4 state that this change has been made, but the change is not reflected on the public Wikipedia page. Hyman was a social studies, not social sciences, major and she was the editor in chief of The Harvard Crimson’s weekly magazine, not the newspaper.
“Delete :”
She received her BA in social sciences in 2002, where Hyman was editor-in-chief of the Harvard Crimson.
“Instead, add:”
She received her BA in social studies from
Harvard University in 2002. At Harvard, Hyman was the editor-in-chief of The Harvard Crimson’s weekly magazine Fifteen Minutes and was among the founding members of the Seneca Club, one of the school’s first women’s clubs.
[2]
In the previous round of revisions, you advised that the source for biographical information needs to be a secondary source. Below is information about Jennifer Hyman’s next career moves with two options for appropriate secondary sourcing.
After graduating from Harvard, Hyman worked for
Starwood Hotels, where she started the company’s wedding registry program. She then went on to hold management positions at then-start-up WeddingChannel.com and global talent management company IMG.
[3][4]
In the previous round of revisions, you noted that the term “pop up shop” was unclear. I’ve rephrased the below to mimic Jennifer Hyman’s career steps exactly as they are recorded in the secondary source and linked to the Wikipedia page that defines the term “pop up shop.”
Hyman and
Fleiss then cold-emailed
Diane von Furstenberg for advice. They learned that designers like von Furstenberg were looking for ways to market to younger women.
To figure out whether their idea would scale, they also hosted a
pop-up shop on Harvard’s undergraduate campus. Hyman and
Fleiss bought 100 dresses at Bloomingdale’s with their own savings to test whether women would actually rent dresses, which designers were most sought after, and how the company could recollect, launder, and redistribute the rentals.
[5]
Add the following to complete the narration of Jennifer Hyman’s career trajectory.
After receiving $1.7M in seed capital from
Bain Capital, Hyman and Fleiss officially launched
Rent the Runway in November 2009.
[6]
In 2016, Hyman and
Fleiss launched Rent the Runway Unlimited, a subscription service designed to help women dress for work and everyday life.
[7]
Hyman has since expanded Rent the Runway Unlimited to include home decor and children’s clothing rentals.
[8]Cite error: A <ref> tag is missing the closing </ref> (see the
help page).
In Honors, delete “Hyman was listed in Fortune magazine’s 40 Under 40 in 2012” because it does not reflect the most current and up to date list of honors she has received (i.e. she has received numerous honors since 2012 that are not currently listed on the page).
^VonFurstenberg, Diane (2017-10-16).
"Jennifer Hyman". The Huffington Post. Retrieved 2019-12-06.
Thank you for your reply, and your feedback from my questions, which is most appreciated. I look forward to working through this edit request to get the correct information into the article. Unfortunately however, it looks as if several of the references you've provided are to non-functioning URL's. If you could, go ahead and locate the correct ones (and simply replace the broken ones in your request above) then we can proceed with the review. Please advise. Regards, Spintendo22:56, 8 January 2020 (UTC)reply
Hi Spintendo, Checking back in to see if you've had a chance to look at the updated URLs so we can update the page. Let me know! Thanks. — Preceding
unsigned comment added by
50.74.137.26 (
talk)
21:07, 4 February 2020 (UTC)reply
Hi Spintendo, Sorry to bother you again, but wanted to see if you've had a chance to look at the revisions so we can get this page to be as accurate as possible. Thank you! — Preceding
unsigned comment added by
38.86.165.164 (
talk)
18:16, 6 March 2020 (UTC)reply